Reclaiming the Roadmap: Why I’m Choosing a Healthier Path This Time
I stepped on the scale for the first time in a while last week. I had no idea what number was going to pop up, but what's most important is that I didn’t expect the reaction I had.
That number sent me spiraling. Not because it defined me, but because it pulled up memories of the times I let it. It was a reminder that I often catch myself being someone who tries to runaway from who I used to be instead of running toward a new, refined, and happier version of myself.
The scale reminded me of past habits I used to yo-yo with my weight, justify unhealthy weight loss, shortcuts I took to feel more in control, and the guilt I carried regardless of the way the scale move.
That morning shook me more than I’d like to admit. For a moment, it felt like all the work I’ve done, mentally, physically, emotionally, had slipped. But once the noise settled, I realized something important: I do not need to go back to that old version of progress to move forward.
I rebounded with a clearer head. I looked at the habits I’d let slip, and instead of punishing myself for them, I thought of a loose and flexible plan to build them back but this time, slowly, sustainably, and with intent.
I also reminded myself that there's so much more to fitness and wellness besides the number on the scale. I shouldn't be surprised I've gained weight - I'm running less and strength training has been my priority so far this year. While I was shaken up that I had gained as much as I did, I did take a deep breath that I at least asked for some of this when I laid out my goals for the year.
I’ve Lost Weight the Wrong Way Before
I’ve dropped 50 pounds before. Twice, actually. I know how to manipulate numbers, track every calorie, and push past what my body’s asking for. But I also know the toll it takes physically, mentally, and emotionally.
This time, I’m not chasing the fastest path. I’m chasing the most solid one. I want to get leaner, that is true. But not at the expense of performance, health, or peace of mind. I want to feel lighter on my feet and lighter in my head. I know weight loss will help me with running, fitting a little better in my clothes, and some other challenges I face. That's a massive difference than the times before where I felt like I needed to lose weight to prove that I was worthy as a person.
I'’m going to get there is by compounding small wins. Dialing in my nutrition. Getting strong in the gym. Prioritizing sleep. Hydration. Moving with purpose.
Why 2025 Matters
2025 is a big year. I’m stepping into it with goals that stretch across every part of my life:
- Athletically, I want to compete at a higher level—with strength and endurance.
- Professionally, I’m growing Architecting Wellness and continuing my education in sport psychology.
- Emotionally, I’m doing the work to stay grounded and resilient through uncertainty.
- Personally, I want to be energized, clear, and fully present for whatever life brings me this year.
To show up fully in all of these areas, I need to treat myself like someone worth showing up for. That doesn’t mean extreme restriction or chasing perfection. It means committing to habits that align with where I’m going and not punishing myself for where I’ve been.
I’m in Control of the Roadmap
The scale isn’t a scoreboard. My consistency, energy, and peace are the scoreboard. If I focus on the fundamentals, maintain a positive attitude, and stay patient, I'm bound to get this win of losing a little bit of weight without feeling restricted.
This time around, I’m not reacting, rather I’m responding with intention. I’m designing the roadmap instead of just following one. Every habit I show up for is a vote for the future I want.
If you’re in a similar place, feeling behind, frustrated, or tempted to go backward, know this: you can choose a better path. One that works with your body, not against it. One that holds space for your goals without sacrificing your wellbeing.
Stay safe, stay healthy!
Martin Foley - Founder, Architecting Wellness
