As They Say, Never Miss a Monday
They say never miss a Monday.
Last week, I missed mine. I missed the newsletter I committed to writing every week. If you know me, you know that stuff eats at me. I want to be consistent. I want to be reliable. I want to be someone who shows up.
At first, I was very frustrated with myself.
But then I zoomed out: I had just raced my first DEKA Fit event (which was a ton of fun even if I am pretty "eh" about my performance), hosted Easter, and got ready for a commute that tests my patience more than I care to admit.
When you stack it up like that, it makes sense. Life happened. And that’s something I wish more people were honest about, especially in a world where social media loves showing off 1000-day streaks, 4:30 AM wake-ups, and flawless morning routines.
The truth is that real life isn’t built for perfection.
In psychology, there’s a concept called all-or-nothing thinking (Beck, 1976), a cognitive distortion where people believe that if they don't meet every standard perfectly, they have failed completely. I used to live there.
If I missed a Monday—or a workout, a meal plan, a journal entry—I figured the week was ruined and I would spiral, hard.
It’s the classic perfectionist trap, something researchers Dr. Paul Hewitt and Dr. Gordon Flett studied for decades. Their research shows that maladaptive perfectionism—setting impossible standards and beating yourself up when you miss them—is strongly linked to burnout, depression, and anxiety.
What changed for me was learning something called behavioral momentum. Simply put, just because you stumble doesn't mean you lose all your progress. If you can keep moving, even if it is imperfectly, you still build strength, discipline, and self-trust over time (Nevin, 1996).
Now, when I miss a Monday, I don’t spiral.
I see it for what it is: A human moment.
I remind myself that I have six other days to move forward.
Sometimes, missing a Monday even helps. Maybe I needed a little more rest. Maybe it forces me to approach the week with a little more thought instead of bulldozing through.
This is called self-compassion. Research from Dr. Kristin Neff shows that people who practice self-compassion are more likely to stay consistent over the long haul—not because they push harder, but because they recover faster from setbacks.
Consistency is less about perfection and more about getting back up before you talk yourself into quitting.
If you missed your Monday—literally or figuratively—welcome to the club!
Life throws things at us. Family plans pop up. Car trouble drains you. The alarm does not go off.
Missing a Monday is not a character flaw. It’s part of the process.
What matters is not whether you missed your Monday, but rather whether you still show up Tuesday.
And the best part is, you are always one decision away from being back on track.
Stay safe, stay healthy!
Martin Foley - Founder, Architecting Wellness
